1.  You will receive a body.  You may like it or hate it, but it will be yours for the entire period this time around.

 2.  You will learn lessons.  You are enrolled in a full-time informal school called life.  Each day in  this school you will have the opportunity to learn lessons.  You may like the lessons or you may think them irrelevant and stupid.

 3.  There are no mistakes, only lessons.  Growth is a process of trial and error, experimentation.  The 'failed' experiments are as much a part of the process as the experiment that ultimately 'works.'

 4.  A lesson is repeated until learned.  A lesson will be presented to you in various forms until you have learned it.  When you have learned it, you can go to the next lesson.

 5.  Learning lessons does not end.  There is no part of life that does not contain it's lessons.  If you are alive, there are lessons to be learned.

 6.  'There' is no better then 'here.'  When your 'there' has become a 'here', you will simply obtain another 'there' that will look better than 'here.'

 7.  Others are merely mirrors of you.  You cannot love or hate something about another person unless it reflects to you something you love or hate about yourself.

 8.  What you make of your life is up to you.  You have all the tools and resources you need.  What you do with them is up to you.  the choice is yours.

  9.  Your answers lie inside you.  The answer to life's questions lie inside you.  All you need to do is look , listen and trust.

10.  This will often be forgotten, only to be remembered again.

 ~~~ Cherie Carter-Scott~~~ 

 

Be on the lookout for symptoms of inner peace.  The hearts of a great many have already been exposed to inner peace and it is posible that people everywhere could come down with it in epidemic proportions.  This could pose a serious threat to what has, up to now, been a fairly stable condition of conflict in the world.  

Some signs and symptoms of inner peace:

* A tendency to think and act spontaneously rather than on fears based on past experiences.

* An unmistakable ability to enjoy each moment.

* A loss of interest in judging other people.

* A loss of interest in interpreting the actions of others.

* A loss of interest in conflict.

* A loss of the ability to worry.  (This is a very serious symptom).

* Frequent, overwhelming episodes of appreciation.

* Contented feelings of connectedness with others and nature.

* Frequent attacks of smiling.

* An increasing tendency to let things happen rather than make them happen.

* An increased susceptibility to the love extended by others as well as the uncontrollable urge to extend it.

 

 An ancient story has it that heaven and hell are exactly alike in that each is an enormous banquet with every wonderful dish imaginable crowding the great round table.

The diners are provided with chopsticks---FIVE FEET LONG!

In hell, the diners give up struggling to feed themselves with these impossible tools and sit in ravenous frustration.

In heaven, everyone simply feeds the person across the table.       

~~~Chungliang Al Huang~~~ 

As I head out the door into another day of OPPRESSIVE heat and humidity...temps AGAIN to reach in the 100F to 105F range (and yes, this IS cooler than the usual 105F - 109F, so why complain?)...and I don't even want to discuss heat indices...this list was on my Myspace bulletin last night.  It will give some insight into just how hot it REALLY is out there!

    1.  Birds have to use potholders to pull worms out of the ground.

    2.  The trees are whistling for the dogs.

    3.  The best parking place is determined by shade and not distance.

    4.  Hot water now comes out of both taps.

    5.  You can make sun tea instantly.

    6.  You learn that a seat buckle makes a pretty good branding iron.

    7.  The temperature drops below 95F and you feel a little chilly.

    8.  You discover it only takes two fingers to steer your car.

    9.  You find you can get sunburned through your car window.

  10.  You break into a sweat the instant you step outside at 7:30 AM.

  11.  Your biggest bicycle fear is, "What if I get knocked out and end up lying on the pavement and cook to death?"

  12.  You realize asphalt has a liquid state.

  13.  The potatoes cook underground, so all you have to do is pull one out and add butter, salt and pepper.

  14.  Farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them from laying boiled eggs.

  15.  The cows are giving evaporated milk.

  16.  You'd trade your pool of sweat for a bed of nails any night.

  17.  You'd rather starve to death than cook dinner.

Feel free to add to this...and...stay cool!  :-) 

Before going much farther with this post,  would first like to express gratitude that I am not a writer...at least  that I don't rely on writing to earn a living.  I've had quite a 'writer's block' for a few days...still not sure I've overcome it....but here goes.

I decided to just follow my intuition a bit...it was my intention to shut down the PC and hit the hay as I had reached the conclusion that I just simply lacked the inspiration to blog anything,  when my persuasive 'inner voice' nudged me back out into cyberspace.  The cursor behaving like the planchette on a Ouija Board guiding me to the bookmark icon, then scrolling down to a neglected site Unknowing Mind.  (This after having visited another neglected but awesome site, The Prism Spiritual Forums.  which led to another neglected project that I had started,  which is to finish reading The Milk Is White - but that will be another blog!)

Perusing the various posts, the following spoke rather loudly to me, and I hope it does to those of you who choose to read this.

Set Winning and Losing Aside - a post from Friday, August 4th.

 From the Sangama Sutra:
  
 Winning gives birth to hostility.   Losing, one lies down in pain.
 The calmed lie down with ease,  having set winning and losing aside.

The Buddha uttered this verse when told of the defeat in battle of King Pasenadi at the hand of King Ajatasattu.  Given the context, this verse was a commentary on warfare.  [Appropriate for the violence occurring today].

What DO we gain by having to win?  Anything more than an ego boost?

In an essay entitled A Human Approach to World Peace, the Dalai Lama wrote:

    Of the many problems we face today, some are natural calamities and must be        accepted and faced with equanimity.  Others, however, are of our own making, created by misunderstanding, and can be corrected.  One such type arises from the conflict of ideologies, political or religious, when people fight each other for petty ends, losing sight of the basic humanity that binds us all together as a single human family.  We must remember that hte different religions, ideologies, and political systems of the world are meant for human beings to achieve happiness.  We must not lose sight of this fundamental goal and at no time should we place means above ends; the supremacy of humanity over matter and ideology must always be maintained.

Violenece is never the answer.

   

                        Want to start the day with some outrageous, contagious laughter?

                                                               This is HILARIOUS!

                                  http://www.chumfm.com/MorningShow/bits/March24.swf

                                                        Have a Great Day Everyone!

 One day it occurred to a certain emperor that if he only knew the answers to three questions, he would never stray in any matter.

1) What is the best time to do anything?
2) Who are the most  important people to work with?
3) What is the most important thing to do at all times?

The emperor issued a decree throughout his kingdom announcing that whoever could answer the questions would receive a great reward.  Many who read the decree made their way to the palace at once, each with a different answer.

In reply to the first question, one person advised the use of a thorough time schedule to be followed each day, down to the letter.

Another advised he put all vain amusements aside and remain attentive to everything in order to know what to do and at what time.

Yet another advised he set up a Council of the Wise, and act according to their advice.

And if he wanted to know in advance when to do something, he should consult with magicians and soothsayers.

Responses to the second and third questions were also out of accord, and included such recommendations as  placing reliance on priests, monks, physicians and warriors.

To the third question some said science was the most important pursuit, others insisted on religion or military skill.
                                                  ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

            
                           The emperor was not pleased, so no reward was given.

 
                                                  ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After several nights of reflection, the emperor resolved to visit a hermit who lived up on the mountain and was said to be an enlightened man.  The emperor wished to find the hermit and ask him the three questions.  Knowing the hermit never left the mountains and was known to only receive the poor, the emperor disguised himself as a simple peasant.  He ordered his attendants to wait for him at the foot of the mountain while climbed the slope alone to seek the hermit.

Reaching the holy man's dwelling place, the emperor found the hermit digging a garden in front of  his hut.  The emperor approached him and said, 'I have come to ask your help with three questions:  When is the best time to do each thing?  Who are the most important people to work with? What is the most important thing to do at all times?

The hermit listened attentively but only patted the emperor on the shoulder and continued digging.  The emperor said, 'You must be tired, here, let me give you a hand wit that.'  The hermit thanked him, handed the emperor the spade, then sat down on the ground to rest.

After he dug two rows, the emperor turned to the hermit and asked his questions again.  The hermit still did not answer.  Two hours later the emperor put down the spade and said to the hermit, 'If you can't answer my questions, please let me know so I can be on my way home.'

At that moment, the hermit lifted his head and asked, 'Do you hear someone running over there?'  They both turned to see a man emerge from the woods, running wildly, pressing his hands against a bloody wound in his stomach.  The man ran toward the emperor before falling to the ground where he lay groaning.  Opening the man's clothing, the emperor and the hermit noticed the man had received a deep gash.  They cleaned the wound and offered him water to drink  before carrying him to the hermit's hut.  

Fatigue had set in and the man and the emperor fell asleep, only to awaken just after day break, each mildly confused, having awakened in unfamiliar surroundings.  The man then looked over and saw the emperor.  He stared at him intently and then said in a faint whisper, 'Please forgive me.'

'But what have you done that I should forgive you?' the emperor asked.

'You do not know me, your majesty, but I know you.  I was your sworn enemy and I had vowed to take vengeance on you, for during the last war you killed my brother and seized my property.  When I learned you were coming alone to the mountain to meet the hermit, i resolved to surprise you on your way back to kill you.  But after waiting a long time...still no sign of you, I came across your attendants, who recognized me, giving me this wound.  Luckily, I escaped and ran here. 

If I hadn't met you I would surely be dead by now.  I had intended to kill you, but instead you saved my life!  I am ashamed and grateful beyond words.  If I live, I vow to be your servant for the rest of my life.  Please grant me your forgiveness.'

The emperor not only forgave him, he returned his seized property, has his physician care for him and his attendants to return him to his home after he completely healed.

Before returning to the palace, the emperor decided to once more ask the hermit his three questions.  The hermit looked at the  emperor and said, 'But your questions have already been answered'

'How's that?' the emperor asked, puzzled.

'Yesterday, if you had not taken pity on my age and given me a hand with digging these beds, you would have been attacked by that man on your way home.  Then you would have regretted not staying with me. 
Therefore, the most important time was the time you were digging the beds.
The most important person was myself,  and the most important pursuit was to help me.

Later, when the wounded man ran up here, the most important time was the time you spent dressing his wound, for if you had not cared for him he would have died and you would have lost the chance to be reconciled with him.  Likewise, he was the most important person, and the most important pursuit was taking care of his wound.

Remember, there is only ONE important time, and that is NOW.

The most important person is always the person with whom you are, who is right before you, for who knows if you will have dealings with any other person in the future.

The most important pursuit is making that person, the one standing at your side, happy, for that alone is the pursuit of life.'

~~~Leo Tolstoy ~~~

   The radical truth is that you are not a human being in a physical world.

   The radical truth is that you are utterly free without any boundary or limitation whatsoever.

   You are unborn and there is no death.

   The radical truth is that nothing has ever been created.

   Prior to existence or nonexistence
                                                                                   I  AM

                                         _______________________________________                 


     "All the forms in which God id worshipped are products of the human imagination.  The proper way to experience God is to feel with all your inner being that you are the Divine itself.  That experience will make you feel the presence of the Divine in all beings and in all things.  With that experience there will be no room for hatred towards anyone.  Such a one will not do evil deeds."

                                                                                            ~~~ Sathya Sai Baba ~~~

                                                                                        
                                                                       

Ever Wonder How Many Christians Is Takes To Change A Lightbulb?

Charismatic:  Only 1   
                          Their hands are already in the air.

Pentecostal:   10
                          One to  change the bulb, and 9 to pray against the spirit of darkness.

Presbyterians:  None
                             Lights will go on and off at predestined times.

Roman Catholic:  None
                                 Candles only.

Baptists:  At least 15
                  One to change the light bulb, and 3 committees to approve the change and decide                   who brings the potato salad and fried chicken.

Episcopalians:  3
                              One to call the electriciann, one to mix the drinks and one to talk about
                              how much better the old one was.

Mormons:  5
                     One man to change the bulb and four wives to tell him how to do it.

Unitarians:  ____
                      We choose not to make a statement either in favor or against the need for a
                      lightbulb.  However, if on your journey you have found that light bulbs work
                      for you, you are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your
                      light bulb for the next Sunday service, in which we will explorea number of light
                      bulb traditions, including incandescent, fluorescent, 3-way, long life, halogen,
                      and tinted, all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence.

Methodists:  Undetermined
                       Whether your light is bright, dull, or completely out, you are loved.  You can be
                       a light bulb, a turnip bulb or a tulip bulb.  Bring a bulb of your chioce to the
                       Sunday lighting service and a covered dish to pass.

Lutherans:  None
                      Lutherans don't believe in change.

Amish:  ____
              What light bulb?


  Disclaimer:  The intent of this blog has three purposes:  #1) -  FUN!  #2) I figured I may as well post this, if the Apocolypse DOES arrive tomorrow (8/22/06),  then this will be one less thing for me to wish I had not put off until...?  and,  #3)-  I FINALLY learned how to upload/download/whatever -you-call-it images onto my blog...and well....felt the need to brag before you-know-what (?) happens, and no one would be around to witness my miraculous new skill!!!  

Or I should say, 'new found' skill...the miracle will be if I remember how to duplicate this miraculous feat!

  A little comic relief here while I await CNN's countdown to their  'Story of....the Millenium?'  "In the Footsteps of Bin Laden", or is it 'Know Your Enemy', or....whatever.....

Anyway....On with the good stuff:

                                    Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road?

BILL CLINTON :  I did not cross the road with THAT chicken!  What do you mean by 'chicken?'  Could you define 'chicken', please?

GEORGE W. BUSH :  I don't think I should have to answer that question, it happened back in my drinking days.

RALPH NADER : I don't know why, but I bet it had something to do with escaping corporate control.

JOHN McCAIN :  If there was finance reform, the chicken never would have been forced to cross the road.

SADDAM HUSSEIN : It was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were completely justified threatening the use of WMD's to force the chicken to the other side.

NRA :  It is our constitutional right to shoot chickens crossing the road.

CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK : To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

DR. SEUSS :  Did the chicken cross the road?  Did it cross it with a toad?
                         Yes!  The chicken crossed the road.  But why it crossed, I've not been told.

BILL GATES :  I have just released echicken 2006, which will not only cross roads, but will lay e-eggs, it will have the memory of an e-lephant,  and cross to the other side of the road faster then any other echicken on the market.

JERRY FALWELL : Because the chicken was gay!  Isn't it obvious?  Can't you people see the plain truth in front of your faces?  The chicken was going to the 'other side'.  That is why 'they' call it the 'other' side.  Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay.  And if you let it cross the road, then you too will become gay.  That is why we need the freedom to keep chickens from living around the rest of us.

THE BIBLE :  And then God said unto the chickens, 'Thou shalt cross the road.'  And the chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing.

COLONEL SANDERS : I missed one?

That is the question I keep asking of me. 

In the past the matter of exercising was never a question...I did it because I wanted to and It made me feel good. But here lately, I have no idea what has come over me....I can find SO many reasons not to workout, and I know one day, unless I get a heaping dose of inspiration....well.....let's just hope I find some inspiration from somewhere!

And speaking of sources of inspiration, I'm not terribly picky... Steven Segal or Antonio Bandaras will do just fine!

The following list of TOP 10 REASONS contains a few items that have served me well in my daily decision making process:

                                                To Exercise Or Not To Exercise


1.    It is well documented that for every mile you jog, you add one minute to your life.  This enables you, at age 85, to spend an additional 5 months in a nursing home at $5,000 per month.

2.    My grandmother started walking 5 miles a day when she was 60.  She is now 70 and we don't know where she is.

3.    The only reason I would take up jogging is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.

4.     I joined a health club last year, spent about $400.  Haven't lost a pound.  Apparently you have to show up.

5.     I have to exercise early in the morning before my brain figures out what I'm doing.

6.     Don't exercise at all.  If God meant for us to touch our toes, he would have put them further up on our body.

7.     I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

8.     The advantage of exercising every day is that you die healthier.

9.     If you are going to try cross country skiing, start with a small country.

10.   And last, but not least, I don't jog - it makes the ice jump right out of my glass.
          
                           

 This guy was climbing a tree when suddenly he slipped, then grabbed a branch and was hanging there.  After an hour or so had passed he felt himself getting exhausted and looked up to the heavens and cried out: "God, help me, please, help me." 

  All of a sudden the clouds parted and a voice boomed out from on high.  "Let Go!" said the voice.

  The guy paused and looked up at heaven once more, and then said, "Is there anyone else up there?"

 
I ran across these the other day....they are old, but then so am I, and I'm still funny...  So here goes:

1.    It's always darkest before dawn.  So if you're going to steal your neighbors paper, that's the time to do it.

2.    Sex is like air.  It's not important unless you aren't getting any.

3.    Don't be irreplaceable.  If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.

4.    No one is listening..... until you fart.

5.    Always remember you are unique.   Just like everyone else.

6.    Never test the depth of water with both feet.

7.    Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes.  That way, when you do criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.

8.    Some days you are the bug.  Some days you are the windshield.

9.    Duct tape is like the Force.  It has a light side and a dark side, and it holds the universe together.

10.  We are born naked, wet and hungry and get slapped on our ass....then things get worse.